One afternoon in the
mid-1970s, I was walking along, some 20 yards behind a guy heading east on the
800 block of West Grace Street. I think it was summertime, but I don't remember anything in particular about the weather. Anyway, the guy in front of me nonchalantly picked up the Organic Food Store’s hand-painted sandwich board style
sign from the sidewalk, put it under his arm and kept walking.
We both kept heading eastward. I don't
remember what I first thought, at the time, but I was curious about it and to close the distance between
us, I
walked a little faster down the red
brick sidewalk.
By the time we had passed the Biograph Theatre (where I
worked), I was pretty sure that he had no honest reason to take the sign. He was a
big-haired hippie and I suppose he could have been a student. Or,
he might have been a traveling panhandler/opportunist. In those days
there were plenty of both in the neighborhood.
Passing by Sally
Bell’s Kitchen, in the 700 block, I was within five yards of him
when I spoke the lines I had just written for myself. My tone
was resolute: “Hey, I saw you take the sign. Just put it down and walk away.”
The thief’s
body
language announced that he had heard me. He didn’t turn around.
Instead he walked faster. I continued following and I said with more force:
“Put the sign down. The cops are already on the way. Walk away, while you still
can” (or words to that effect).
Without
further ado, the wooden sign clattered onto the sidewalk. I was delighted!
The sign thief
kept just going without looking back. As I gathered my neighbor’s property, I
watched the fleeing hippie break into a sprint. He crossed Grace Street was last seen going toward Monroe Park at the next corner. By then, it all struck me as funny.
So I carried the recovered property back to the store. Obviously, I
don’t really remember
exactly what I said in this incident, all those years ago, verbatim, but
what you just read was a faithful recounting of the events and the
spirit of what I said.
What I had done came in part from a sense of righteous indignation. That, together
with the spirit of camaraderie that existed among some of the
neighborhood’s merchants in that time. There were several of us, then in
our mid-to-late-20s, who were operating businesses on that bohemian strip — bars,
retail shops, etc. We were friends and we watched out for one another.
My
tough guy performance had
lasted less than a minute. Now
I’m amazed that I used to do such things. Young people can be so sure of their interpretation of what they see. The character I invented was
drawn somewhat from
Humphrey Bogart, with as much Robert Mitchum as I could muster.
Hey,
since the thief bought the act, he probably felt lucky to have gotten away. Who knows? Maybe he’s
still telling this same story, too, but from another angle.
This
much I know — that quirky milieu on Grace Street in those days was a
goldmine of offbeat characters and colorful stories. Chelf’s Drug Store was at the corner
of Grace and Shafer. With its antique soda fountain,
it had been a hangout for magazine-reading art students for decades. It seemed frozen in time. Maybe the late-1940s?
The original Village
Restaurant, a block west of Chelf’s, was a legendary beatnik watering
hole, going back to the 1950s. Writer Tom Robbins and artist William
Fletcher “Bill” Jones (1930-‘98) hung out there. In the '60s and '70s the same neighborhood was also home to
cartoon-like characters, such as the wandering Flashlight Lady and the
Grace Street Midget.
By the late-'70s the scene in that neighborhood had evolved. It was
meaner and more dangerous. Bars hired badass bouncers to guard their front doors. Style-wise, hippies
were gradually being replaced by punks. Cocaine was replacing pot as the most
popular recreational drug.
In 1981, or so, I can also remember a summer day
when an angry, red-bearded street
beggar with a missing foot was scaring old ladies coming and going from
the then-new Dominion Place apartment building on the 1000 block of
Grace. He and I were about the same age.
As I walked by, I said something to him like, "Hey, cut it out. Move on!"
The surly panhandler laughed like a corny villain in a slasher movie and threatened to, “Bite a plug” out of me. And, I'm sure that's exactly what he said.
Wisely, I didn’t
press my case any further. Instead, I moved on.
*
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